"Jesus answered, 'It is the one to whom I will give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish.' Then, dipping the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas Iscariot, son of Simon. As soon as Judas took the bread, Satan entered into him." John 13:26, 27
John has just leaned back and asked Christ who was going to betray him. Christ replied that he would give the culprit the bread that he had dipped into the dish.
Last night I had the privilege of having dinner with Donna and Ken Neill. We went out to a fabulous Italian restaurant called Maggianos in Atlanta. The meal was served family style... And course after course after course was brought to the table. As much was sent home with us as was consumed, I think. The meal started simply enough. It was a bread course where a small basket of flatbreads and Italian breads were brought to the table along with a small dish of Olive Oil. I thought of this verse more than once as we took our bread out of the basket, broke off pieces of it and dipped it into the oil before eating it. On a couple of occasions we dipped our bread into the oil at the same time. It would have also been very easy for us to have simply handed a piece of bread that we had already dipped in the bowl to one us seated at the table as an act of courtesy. This very act is the "tell" that let Judas know that his plot was not so secret.
It was a simple act. It probably was not even noticed by many who were at the table. But it became the point of no return for Judas. It says that when Judas took the bread, Satan entered in to him. I wonder how Judas must have felt. Embarrassed? Angry? Determined? Exposed? Whatever it was, from that moment on there would be no turning back for him.
How many times in my life have I thought about, plotted and planned sin? I have to be honest there aren't too many times in my life that I haven't thought about sin before committing it. Every time that I've sinned with forethought there has been a moment when I made my choice. A point in time I could point to and say that this was the point where I made the decision to allow Satan to rule rather than Christ. I guess I'm not so different from Judas after all.
Father, today I confess to you the many times that I consciously chose to rebel against you... To betray you... To sell you out. I am so sorry. Forgive me. Give me the fortitude to stand up to the Evil One. Send your Spirit into my life and have Him turn on the no vacancy light. Assist me in making the right choices. Most of all, Lord, refine my thoughts and desires that they may be in alignment with your will. Thank you.
One of them, the disciple whom Jesus loved, was reclining next to him. Simon Peter motioned to this disciple and said, "Ask him which one he means."
Leaning back against Jesus, he asked him, "Lord, who is it?" John 13:23-25
I can just see this... Christ has dropped the bomb. Someone in the room was going to betray him. John is reclining next to Christ at the table... Contrary to the photo opp earlier in the evening by Da Vinci, the disciples would have been lying on couches or pallets around the table rather than sitting in chairs. But there is this dialog that takes place between Peter and John. I don't even know if there are any words exchanged... Knowing Peter it was probably some sort of animated hand motion that conveyed the command to "Find out who it is." So John leans back, looks up at the Christ and and asks, "So, Lord... Who is this snake?" (Roberts Translation).
There are so many thoughts that go through my mind today as I read this. The first one is that apparently the Disciples had a lot more freedom of movement than I have ever really thought. After all, Judas has been plotting this for a while. He apparently did it in secret, at least none of the other disciples knew what was going on. I had always pictured the twelve following along with Christ 24/7. Never leaving his side... Never having a life of their own. That obviously was not the case. It reminds me of how the Lord gives me the freedom to venture out on my own as I want. No strings, no requirements... I can get into trouble as much as I choose... And I do. How many times have I plotted to betray him through my actions by leaving the side of the Master and company of my fellow Christians? Too many to count, unfortunately.
But I also find myself in the position of John. A loved disciple in a position of honor. In fact, Christ tells me that God has adopted me and made me His child. As a result of that position, I would have the position of honor next to Him at the banquet table in the New Kingdom. It doesn't matter what I've done, or how I've treated Him. He has forgiven me for my wrongs and put me at the table.
I can't help but think about Jehoiachin aka Jechoniah. He was eighteen at the time when he served as King of Israel for three months. He was evil as far as God was concerned. After three months Nebuchadnezzar took him captive and threw him into prison for thirty-seven years. When Armel-Marduk became king, he received a pardon. In 2 Kings it says that he was given a table higher than other kings, a daily allowance, and for the rest of his life he ate at the table of the King.
Here is Jechoniah, one of the worst of the kings... In fact, he is the proud owner of a curse that declares none of his children would ever sit on the throne of Israel. Taken captive, then after 37 years, placed in a position of honor. That's me. I was a captive to sin, taken prisoner by the Prince of this World... But freed by the new King to sit at the banquet table. I could lean back and ask the obvious question... "Who is it?" But the answer would come back... "You!".
Father, thank you for the forgiveness of my sins through the gift of your grace. Thank you for releasing me from captivity to give me a seat of honor at your table. What more can I say?
"After he had said this, Jesus was troubled in spirit and testified, 'I tell you the truth, one of you is going to betray me.' His disciples stared at one another, at a loss to know which of them he meant." John 13:21,22.
Jesus was a man of emotions. He wept at the tomb of Lazarus. He was angry at the Temple when the money changers were cheating the people. He grieved on the Mount of Olives when thinking about the Jews. He was compassionate when the people were hungry. He was sympathetic when he encountered the funeral procession. He was hurt when only one of ten lepers came back to thank him. He agonized in the garden. The disciples were accustomed to seeing Christ show His feelings. But this was a time of celebration. It must have caught them off guard a bit to see Christ upset.
Then came the announcement: One of them would betray Him. That must have been a shock to them, and their reaction was proof. It says that they just stared at each other. How many times do I read what the Lord has to say, and I just stare? How many times do I just read His word and it just goes over my head? How many times do I say, "I'll get into that more later", missing the point that this is a really important announcement.
How many times am I flat wrong? A few weeks ago, I made the comment that Judas had already left the room when talking about the washing of the feet. I was wrong. Judas was plotting, but he is still there as becomes obvious later in the week. There is a passage coming up in the next couple of days that I really have a difficult time with understanding. I have a choice. I can read it and stare, or I can really try to understand it's meaning. Now the question is what will I choose to do.
Father, too many times I let important declarations from your word just go over my head. I ask your forgiveness for not paying closer attention. Sometimes I need to clarify my own questions. At other times, I just need to accept your word at face value. Other times I just need to roll up my sleeve and do some homework... And that has never been my strong suit. Open my heart and do bypass surgery on my complacency. Don't let me be caught in your presence just staring at the others in a total lack of comprehension.
"I tell you the truth, whoever accepts anyone I send accepts me; and whoever accepts me accepts the one who sent me." John 13:20
This reminds me of algebra class. If a=b and b=c then a=c. A corollary to that is if a=c and b=c then a=b. It's right up there with two other obscure mathematical theorems, "The mass of a chocolate brownie increases infinitely until it reaches your thighs" and "Golf scores are proportional to the amount of people present." Christ says here, "whoever accepts anyone I send accepts me" (a=b). "...And whoever accepts me accepts the one who sent me", (a=c). Christ has said that he has been sent by the Father (God). So the logical flow of this is that whoever accepts Christ is accepting God. Cool... But it's the other part that bothers me where b=c... Accepting the ones sent by Christ is accepting God.
Christ also says that if we accept anyone he sends, we are accepting both Him and the Father. Maybe I'm getting too obscure... Maybe I make this more than is meant... But I really struggle with this one. There is precedence that Christ sends people our way. In the Old Testament, we find that angels were sent to Abraham. Christ says in talking about the separation of the Sheep and the Goats in Matthew 25:41-45, "Then he will say to those on his left, 'Depart from me, you who are cursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.' They also will answer, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?' He will reply, 'I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.' " Obviously, getting this one right is important.
My challenge is knowing when b=c. I mean, I don't have a problem with accepting Christ and God... I just tend to leave out the middle part of the equivalence... Of always accepting the ones sent by Christ. I mean, if they don't believe the same theology as I do, I tend to hold them at arms length. If someone panhandles me, I tend to shy away. I don't hire day workers when I need things done at the house... Look what happened to that family out in Utah where their daughter was kidnapped and run around the country by a worker they had hired. I have a responsibility to my family after all. I'm always getting people who want a handout and play the "God" card. So, I end up giving more than I should to people I don't know. I probably enable a lot of people to deceive others. Besides, I'm a soft touch. Marcia and I were out to lunch after the hurricane went through our part of the state. We were out of power in our part of town. When going in to lunch, a man sat down on the curb outside the restaurant in obvious consternation and began to count his change. I asked him if he was needing lunch... I pulled out my wallet thinking I had $5 in it... I only had $20s... I gave him a 20. His response was "God bless you". The question was did he mean it? Or was it a typical down and outer's response?
I guess what I really need is discernment.
Father, I probably waste a lot of resources you give me. I don't always have the gift to discern to whom I should give and who I should accept. It's a tough one for me. Maybe it's a form of rice bowl Christianity. Maybe it's a way of salving my own conscience. I may give because I feel better, but do I always share why I'm being generous? No... Maybe that's the problem. Today I ask you for discernment, boldness and patience. Patience to accept those you send that may not bear the same message that I would share. Or maybe, I need to listen more closely... It could be the same message using different words. Well, I seem to have more questions than answers today. I guess that's when I need to trust you to give me the answers, huh?
For our friends that drop in to visit, we survived Hurricane Frances. I'm in Atlanta this week and have left Marcia to clean up the mess in the yard (typical male). All around us trees were blown down. At least two neighbors of ours had their house crunched by falling trees (as in trunks, not limbs). But we were blessed, no damage. As of last night we did not have power, but hopefully that will be restored soon. Thank you for your prayers.
