"Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. " Matthew 5:4.

As a minister's son, a hospital orderly, a minister for over 14 years, through television and the movies -- I've seen a lot of death. I've been at the bedside of scores of people at the moment of their passing. I've officiated at or been a part of over 200 funerals. I've heard and often repeated that funeral services are not for the deceased, but for the living.

Our country has become more aware of death in the past two years than ever before in its history. The events of 9/11 have brought the fragility of live into clear focus. Although I live in Jacksonville, FL my job requires me to work elsewhere. I've spent the greatest part of the past three years in Washington, DC. In a macabre sort of way, our capitol is a city devoted to death. There is the Vietnam Memorial, the Jefferson Memorial, the Lincoln Memorial, the Federal Law Officers' Memorial. As you go into the main entrance of the Pentagon, there is a large flag-like wall hanging. On that wall hanging is sewn the picture of each of the people who were killed in the tragedy of terrorist attack on that building. It is easy to forget sometimes that forgravesiteaveside marker, for every name on a memorial, for every death certificate in our nation's archive that there are many more that are left behind to mourn their passing. .

Knowing this verse was coming up, I've been listening for how often people use the words mourn or mourning. It is used a lot. In fact, I've realized this week that mourning is less about death than it is loss. One person mourns the loss of their childhood because of family abuse. Another mourns the loss of a relationship. Another is in mourning over a promotion that didn't happen for them. Anytime we experience loss - real or perceived - and are sad about it, we apply the word mourning to that process.

Mourning is a difficult experience. For some, the process never ends. Having been around so much death and loss has taken its toll on me. As a minister I had to learn to stuff the emotions that death brings. To allow myself to be empathetic to the pain that others were experiencing would have been devastating. I would have been unable to function. I find it hard to deal with loss like other people do, now. I'm not very sympathetic - I've become jaded. That is sad.

Christ knew that His followers would experience the loss of His physical presence and He knew how devastating that would be to them. I think this verse is the first hint of what was to come. He said to the disciples (my paraphrase), I'm not going to be around forever, so after I'm gone, I'm going to send somebody to take my place - The Comforter. I know the Holy Spirit does a lot more than just making us feel better. He does, however, provide a "Peace that passes all understandingÂ". And His coming is not a promise anymore. There's no more "will be comforted". He is here now - at this very moment. All I have to do is let Him do his job.

Lord, break down the barriers built over time in my life due to an over-exposure to death. Help me to recognize the intense pain that is felt by others as they experience loss. Give me the sense of caring that I need to share with them the news of your wonderful gift to your believers -- the indwelling of your Holy Spirit. Holy Spirit, comfort me.

- posted by Steve R. @ 2:17 PM

 
"Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 5:3

I don't like being poor. I've been there, done that and was given a tee-shirt. I guess I'm not the only one, though. When I listen to some TV Evangelists, a few have built their ministry's fund-raising around the principle that God doesn't want me poor. If I send them what little bit I have, then God will give me what He has. I know there is a principle of sowing at work here, and faith is a critical piece. But when I hear them say that "God does not want us poor"... well, I'm just not so sure about that. Christ said, "The poor you will have with you always." Mark 14:7 (paraphrased). They make God sound like a heavenly slot machine to me.

But this passage isn't talking about money. It says "Blessed are the poor in spirit...." Spiritually poor? I'm not sure I like that either. I was in the located ministry for 14 years. I'm active in my local congregation. I have an active part in leading the body of Christ in worship. I know what the Bible says, and can dive deep and stay under as long as any college professor. So what IS this verse saying to me?

I work hard to make my living. I'm well paid for what I do. But that seems precarious at best. My company has had a number of layoffs over the last three years... yet we turned the company around and made it profitable. Two weeks ago I was telling Marcia that I was concerned that we were a prime target for a take-over. Tuesday, it was announced that my company is being purchased by one of our primary competitors. Job cuts are a certainty. I don't know if I'll have a job in a few months. Marcia and I have agreed that we will be very austere financially until my position in the new company is more defined. Maybe that's a hint of what Jesus is saying here. When we are poor financially or our financial future is uncertain, we seek to gain wealth every way we can. Maybe I need to apply that attitude to my spiritual life. I need to recognize that I'm spiritually and morally bankrupt... no matter what I have in the bank, I need to seek to build up my "spiritual wealth". Those that truly seek Him because they are desperate to have a relationship with Him: to them is given the kingdom of heaven.

What a reward for shedding my pride and truly determining to see the Christ. Heaven. The place prepared for the saints where the streets are paved with gold and the gates to the city are not inlaid with precious stones... they are precious stones. This isn't a future promise, either. It says "For theirs is...." -- that's present tense... that's right now. We don't follow Christ on a commission plan, it's a trust fund. Sounds ironic, doesn't it? If I'm willing to recognize and acknowledge my spiritual poverty in my relationship with God, I'm then wealthy beyond my wildest dreams.

Lord, it's hard for me to shed my pride. It's difficult for me to recognize that in your eyes I'm am spiritually bankrupt. Open my eyes to the riches that only You can provide. Open my heart to what you would want me to do. Lead me as I seek to know you better.
- posted by Steve R. @ 12:43 AM

 
"And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying, " Matthew 5:2

I love to teach. I even begged my company to allow me to certify as an instructor so that I would have the opportunity to teach more often. I believe my spiritual gift is that of teaching. I spend hours and even weeks preparing so that I can give my presentation smoothly and eloquently.

I know what Jesus is about to say here, I've read these chapters many times before. As a sixth grader I memorized these three chapters and would recite them before audiences. I spent months preparing, learning, memorizing.

It says, "He opened His mouth...". It amazes me this teaching just rolled off the tongue of Jesus. If I were still in located church ministry, I would have spent hours over a couple of weeks preparing this "sermon" and it wouldn't have been that good. It sounds as if this was just an impromptu discussion... that there was no preparation involved or required. No... on second thought... Christ had been preparing to teach this lesson from the moment the foundation of the earth was laid. If it's that important... maybe i'd better pay attention.

Lord, sometimes I'm too busy talking to listen. Sometimes I'm more worried about how I look in front of others to really be willing to learn. Father, when you speak, open my ears so that I can hear... humble me so that I will be willing to make your words my life.
- posted by Steve R. @ 4:39 AM

 
I've finally joined the world of Blogging. While the intent is to create a place to enter my personal devotional thoughts as an incentive to be more faithful in contemplating the Word, it's conceivable that my family and friends may choose to comment. You are welcome to do so... I've started a study of the Sermon on the Mount... I know what it says intellectually, and what the scholars may have written... but what do I think? Hence, the Blog.

Matthew 5:1 -- "And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him:"

I wonder if he went up into a mountain to get away... He had to feel the pressures of constantly being "on". I know I get tired, I wonder if He did, too. I know he was on a divine mission, and He came to be our great physician... but did he ever just want to be left alone?

This was at his popular period. Thousands of people were pressing him for his time everywhere he went. I don't like crowds... I don't like parties... the noise, the confusion, people who I hardly know wanting me to give them free computer advice (and my company charges $7 a minute for that priviledge)... sometimes it just gets to be too much.

But then I think back to when my family went to see the spot where he went. It's beautiful. From the top of the hill... it's hardly a mountain... you can see the entire Sea of Galilee. Maybe he just wanted to be able to enjoy the view and refresh Himself in the panorama that He created.

But then it says, When he was set... So... He went with a purpose. He just needed a moment to get ready, and when He was, He welcomed His disciples to him. I don't guess He was tired, His patience was not stretched to the breaking point. He had a reason... a purpose. Maybe I need to look at my purpose when I get frazzled or impatient.

Lord, refresh me when I get tired. Give me patience and understanding when I'm pressed to give others what they don't have themselves. Lord, help me to renew my committment to my goals and to renew my desire to have my life be a reflection of you.
- posted by Steve R. @ 4:21 PM